We swear, it’s not what it sounds like! These brow-raising wine terms may sound ridiculous, funny or downright absurd, but we assure you they do cross the lips of many a Paso Robles winemaker. We’re mature enough not to giggle when we hear these phrases uttered on a tour of the barrel-room (well, sometimes), but perhaps you will let out a guffaw (we don’t blame you). Don’t be alarmed. We assure you, there is a very good explanation for our brash tone. Plus, it’s TSFW (totally safe for work).
1. “Bung Hole”
Say what? Your mind may race to 1990s MTV cartoon slackers Beavis and Butthead (and their annoying yet infectious chortles), but we can promise you (pinkie swear) that Paso Robles winemakers use this term in a totally unfunny way. A “bung hole” is far from anyone’s derrière. It’s simply the opening in a cask in which wine can be put in or taken out. Extra points for keeping a straight face while you say this one.
Casks aplenty: Let’s get serious. The elegant, rich reds produced by Seven Oxen Estate Wines are delicious when paired with good conversation, good steak, and perhaps a little friendly laughter. Try their 2013 Zinfandel, which features ripe red fruit, subtle vanilla, and an oak finish. (This is an awesome micro-winery.)
Quick and easy mapping and directions to Seven Oxen
2. “Wine Thief”
Stop, thief! Sure, there’s probably criminals out there who manage to get themselves arrested for commandeering truckloads of premium wine (a scary thought for us boutique wine lovers out there). A “wine thief,” in reality, is a very commonly used tool that works almost like a turkey baster to extract wine from a barrel. Truly, we are very grateful for all the wine thieves out there: They allow winemakers (and us) to taste what’s sitting in the barrel long before the wine has matured.
Barrels of fun: Book a private vineyard and barrel tour at Pelletiere and perhaps get a sneak peek taste of the coming vintage. We promise, you won’t get caught red-handed. (Talented vintner, winemaker and vineyard manager are all women!)
Quick and easy mapping and directions to Pelletiere
3. Leesy
This one just sounds silly—or perhaps like some new up-and-coming hip hop star (Lil Leesy has a nice ring to it, no?). Actually, it is a funny-sounding tasting term for the rich aroma that can result from wine “resting on its lees.” What is the lees, you ask? Take a look at the bottom of a bottle of natural/unfiltered wine. It’s simply the sediment consisting of dead yeast cells, grape pulp, seed, and other grape matter that accumulates during fermentation. Sounds gross, but it makes wine amazing.
A natural approach: Lone Madrone winery produces terroir driven wines that showcase the true character of Westside Paso Robles soil—sediment and all. Book a tasting room flight and enjoy five outstanding wines sourced from a choice selection of celebrated sustainable and dry farmed vineyards. (Winemaker and co-owner, Neil Collins, was voted winemaker of the year by his Paso winemaker peers!)
Quick and easy mapping and directions to Lone Madrone
4. “Foxy”
Foxy lady? No, we’re not coming on to you. If a winemaker starts throwing words like “foxy” around the tasting room, just keep your cool and rest assured he or she is merely describing the musty odor and flavor of wines made from vitis labrusca, a common North American varietal. No shade to this grape, but most winemakers would not want their wines to share “foxy” characteristics, even if you’d prefer to be described that way.
And now for something completely different: There’s absolutely nothing musty about this bright white, which is as clear as a summer day in Paso. Écluse Wines’ 2016 Prelude Rhone Style Blend showcases aromas of peach, tropical fruit, and a hint of honey. A glimmer of citrus and pineapple round out it’s totally fresh appeal. (Écluse supports eye-seeing dogs with their “Blind Dog” red blend, thumbs up!)
Quick and easy mapping and directions to Écluse Wines
5. Cellar Rat
Before your skin starts crawling…We are not talking about those flea-bitten miscreants that plague our attics on occasion. They are, in fact, the upstanding (and very, very hardworking people) who work in the wine cellars of most wineries. Commonly known as one of the lowest jobs on the totem pole (due to the low light, humidity, and never-ending dirty work). However, this position is not anything to be ashamed of. These folks are only lovingly called “rats,” and they are often known to work their way all the way up to the title of award winning winemaker. Sure, it’s more favorable to work in the fresh air of the vineyard, but we all have to start somewhere, right?
From the cellar to stellar: Respected boutique Paso Robles winery Bodega de Edgar was started by a self-proclaimed “Cellar Rat” who went on to learn all aspects of the wine industry. His enthusiasm only grew, and so did his fans. Now Bodega de Edgar produces nearly 2,500 cases of fabulous Spanish style wines each year. (Edgar’s passion shines through in all of his outstanding wines.)
Quick and easy mapping and directions to Bodega de Edgar
This blog is written by flavor fiend Hayley Cain. Follow her @flavorslo on Instagram or at astoldbyhayley.com.
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